Toddlerhood the highpoints of parenthood. the beautiful stage between one to three (maybe a lil beyond that too) where the world is so beautiful and they make you see the world in wonderful new ways..from the bugs in the grass.. to the shapes in the clouds,colors of the rainbow...some fireflies sparkling in the evening hours...to the sound of a waterfall or fountain.. Toddlers brim with curiosity,excitement and an irresistible charm.
.JPG)
As you all know i have a toddler named Sunshine and now that its summers there is so much of outside play and bucket list that runs over and keeps us so so busy. one tick on our busy bucket list is visiting the childrens museum i often take sunshine to the 'Please touch museum' a wonderful exhibit and touch and play museum filled with imaginative play toys and tools for kids i simply love going there we try and go in the summers on the first Wednesday of every month. so last year we must have gone there like ...4 consecutive months but did not attempt to go in the winters. So this summers i took him almost after 6 or 7 months and i could notice he really recognised the place so well that he first wanted to do a survey round of the entire museum he played a bit in the water play area (he loves to move small boats and ducks here it his favorite place) but quickly walked downstairs towards 'goosey' and 'Moo' i was disappointed bcos i thought why is he not staying back here at the water play area the last time we came he loved it . but i slowly began to realise he took a round of the whole museum played a bit with all the play tools he could recollect and then came back to the water thing again and spent a good half an hour there :) Toddlers do have a strong opinion now - Welcome to toddlerhood!!
I also love visiting different libraries and my local library has a reading program named 'Terrific Toddlers' and i thought it was so cool because it exactly defines the way they are..yes they are upright, opinionated, headstrong and travelling so fast like the 'Light in action' and that they are just so terrific little stars!! They are like this pre-historic human tribes - strong willed, tenacious,distracted and impatient. So ive been reading, hearing, smelling, seeing a toddler and hence got a tad more curious and decided to borrow more books on toddlers to understand them and know more about their little world and heres what i came up with....
Quick bits toddler tips:
The different phases of tantrums - I'm sure like 'Terrific Toddlers' there are a few other Ts that define toddlers and the biggest one being 'Tantrum' What exactly is a tantrum - its this long shrill screammmmmmmm that could shatter glass! And bcos they are toddlers and do have a opinion but cant speak up always or express it clearly they do throw tantrums and get agitated if things don't go their way here s the crux - do you just give them what they want bcos they'l stop screeching and screaming or let the tantrum continue for a bit let them calm by themselves? If you are at home walk into another room and ignore them they'l come walking up to you for attention after the tantrum bells stop ringing they know you are ignoring them this is the best time to calm them and explain to them what is right or wrong but don't stretch it beyond a point their brains are little yet and they will gather how much they are supposed to but trust me this works!!
If you experience a tantrum at the supermarket or at a children s story time (this has happened with me) best is to walk out get into your car and have some quiet time. I tell sunshine lets make some giraffe sounds after a outdoor tantrum, just so you know giraffes don't have vocal chords so giraffe sound is equal to a quiet time. They get the message that when you are outdoor a tantrum might not be a good thing and hence Mommy expects some silence.
Do not Punish but praise using 'time outs' - Start practising time outs after the age of 2.5 thats when they will understand at least a bit of it. If you think something is not right and he repeatedly does the same give him a 'Time out 'and tell him to sit quiet in his time out chair in a corner for 2 minutes and talk to them cheerfully whilst they are seated there that as you grow the time out times would increase so at the age of 3 it would be 3 minutes at 4 it would be 4 minutes and so on they get the hint! Always praise that they did a good job sitting quiet and listening to Mommy during a time out.So it ain't a punishment but the praise that can get you a win - win!!
Good Manners - Manners can be taught to toddlers as early as 2 or 2.5 years. I know a lot of parents who complain they won't bring their toddlers to a restaurant bcos they fear glasses breaking, table tops being pulled out etc etc. Good manners like table manners, saying please, thank you, sorry, excuse me can be taught very much to a toddler. A 2.5 year old must sit thru in a restaurant for dinner in his baby chair yes with a few crayon sticks and a paper is okay till the food arrives. Some kids i see are enthralled with their ipads and gadgets in a restaurant we used to do that too but now i carry it with me just in case its needed else i don't remove it from my bag and instead engage him in talks or simply give him a puzzle to do where he can use his motor skills but surely avoid the ipad. i guess as parents we are so nervous and predictable about a tantrum outburst that we apply the shortcut but kids can adapt very easily if no ipad is available then no ipad time its simple!!
Trade Trick - Toddlers do have a tendancy to not share their toys, books, play tools etc with friends. its very very normal bcos they fear that the friend will take it away and they love and are super possesive about their things it 'belongs to me' is their expression with frown eyebrows always afterall we pamper them with so many toys and mountains of play tools at home so all of a sudden a friend who is not a friend in the real sense wants to borrow they don't understand the concept. Try the trade trick if they show a hesitance to share - announce a trade idea ' lets trade the train for the Dino instead' how about that ? they get into thinking and slowly do understand this concept they might not share immediately but a few try s do work wonders but do not stress it too much just whenever they are ready!!
Side door messages work - Here s' a curious fact of human nature. we believe things we accidentally overhear than something that is told to us directly so if someone says i look beautiful i feel shes just being polite whereas if i hear her telling another friend about me (the same message) i would think its a honest opnion. Toddlers too tend to pay more attention to overhear us than pay attention to what we tell them directly. So here it is - Try to create a lot of gossiping and fairy tales pick up his toy phone and call up Daddy and appreciate what a good job he did building blocks or call his grand mom and say he is doing a great job eating his vegetables. All of that side door gossiping works!!!
Reverse psychology yes its superb - Making tendency to work in your favor is what s commonly called 'Reverse psychology' . I got this awesome book for potty training called 'its potty time'so a teddy bear refuses to use the seat although mommy says you are now a big boy. Mommy does not push. One day she brings another potty seat for teddy s doll and says the doll is big now and wears an underwear hence will not wet his pants and wants to use the potty seat so excuse me im going to put dolly in the seat give me a minute curious teddy walks behind and sees what mommy does to the doll teddy realises and says im a big boy too and i will use my potty seat from now on. I was shocked to know a parent started potty training her little one from the age of 9 months i really wonder if anyone can do that ever goshhh!! Every kid will do it when they are ready a toddler age typically post 2 is the best to introduce to a seat till then diapers are absolutely ok!!
Use reverse psychology at its best!!!
It aint time outs always there should be plenty of room for time ins too - Time - ins are little tidbits of attention and routine that help your toddler feel valued. Have you noticed when the phone rings your toddler rings his bells of screeches and screaming too thats bcos he knows you are going to ignore him for a bit they feel they have lost you in that period of time. After you finish the phone call (hopefully you've completed the phone conversation) try time - ins - hug them and tell them im here, few other time -ins that you can use more often during the day - give them a cozy massage and engage into a talk, share positive words and hopes, read a book at bedtime and cuddle them tight, make book sharing time a special time for closeness with your child, sing to your toddler, kiss them and say i love you. It works this is the age they wait to hear all this from you so go overboard!!!
So these are my quick bits toddler tips hope all of it works well with sunshine and with your toddlers too till then .....
Happy Toddlerhood and happy Parenthood !!!
Love,
Sunshine s Mamma
As you all know i have a toddler named Sunshine and now that its summers there is so much of outside play and bucket list that runs over and keeps us so so busy. one tick on our busy bucket list is visiting the childrens museum i often take sunshine to the 'Please touch museum' a wonderful exhibit and touch and play museum filled with imaginative play toys and tools for kids i simply love going there we try and go in the summers on the first Wednesday of every month. so last year we must have gone there like ...4 consecutive months but did not attempt to go in the winters. So this summers i took him almost after 6 or 7 months and i could notice he really recognised the place so well that he first wanted to do a survey round of the entire museum he played a bit in the water play area (he loves to move small boats and ducks here it his favorite place) but quickly walked downstairs towards 'goosey' and 'Moo' i was disappointed bcos i thought why is he not staying back here at the water play area the last time we came he loved it . but i slowly began to realise he took a round of the whole museum played a bit with all the play tools he could recollect and then came back to the water thing again and spent a good half an hour there :) Toddlers do have a strong opinion now - Welcome to toddlerhood!!.JPG) |
I also love visiting different libraries and my local library has a reading program named 'Terrific Toddlers' and i thought it was so cool because it exactly defines the way they are..yes they are upright, opinionated, headstrong and travelling so fast like the 'Light in action' and that they are just so terrific little stars!! They are like this pre-historic human tribes - strong willed, tenacious,distracted and impatient. So ive been reading, hearing, smelling, seeing a toddler and hence got a tad more curious and decided to borrow more books on toddlers to understand them and know more about their little world and heres what i came up with....
Quick bits toddler tips:
The different phases of tantrums - I'm sure like 'Terrific Toddlers' there are a few other Ts that define toddlers and the biggest one being 'Tantrum' What exactly is a tantrum - its this long shrill screammmmmmmm that could shatter glass! And bcos they are toddlers and do have a opinion but cant speak up always or express it clearly they do throw tantrums and get agitated if things don't go their way here s the crux - do you just give them what they want bcos they'l stop screeching and screaming or let the tantrum continue for a bit let them calm by themselves? If you are at home walk into another room and ignore them they'l come walking up to you for attention after the tantrum bells stop ringing they know you are ignoring them this is the best time to calm them and explain to them what is right or wrong but don't stretch it beyond a point their brains are little yet and they will gather how much they are supposed to but trust me this works!!
If you experience a tantrum at the supermarket or at a children s story time (this has happened with me) best is to walk out get into your car and have some quiet time. I tell sunshine lets make some giraffe sounds after a outdoor tantrum, just so you know giraffes don't have vocal chords so giraffe sound is equal to a quiet time. They get the message that when you are outdoor a tantrum might not be a good thing and hence Mommy expects some silence.
Do not Punish but praise using 'time outs' - Start practising time outs after the age of 2.5 thats when they will understand at least a bit of it. If you think something is not right and he repeatedly does the same give him a 'Time out 'and tell him to sit quiet in his time out chair in a corner for 2 minutes and talk to them cheerfully whilst they are seated there that as you grow the time out times would increase so at the age of 3 it would be 3 minutes at 4 it would be 4 minutes and so on they get the hint! Always praise that they did a good job sitting quiet and listening to Mommy during a time out.So it ain't a punishment but the praise that can get you a win - win!!
Good Manners - Manners can be taught to toddlers as early as 2 or 2.5 years. I know a lot of parents who complain they won't bring their toddlers to a restaurant bcos they fear glasses breaking, table tops being pulled out etc etc. Good manners like table manners, saying please, thank you, sorry, excuse me can be taught very much to a toddler. A 2.5 year old must sit thru in a restaurant for dinner in his baby chair yes with a few crayon sticks and a paper is okay till the food arrives. Some kids i see are enthralled with their ipads and gadgets in a restaurant we used to do that too but now i carry it with me just in case its needed else i don't remove it from my bag and instead engage him in talks or simply give him a puzzle to do where he can use his motor skills but surely avoid the ipad. i guess as parents we are so nervous and predictable about a tantrum outburst that we apply the shortcut but kids can adapt very easily if no ipad is available then no ipad time its simple!!
Trade Trick - Toddlers do have a tendancy to not share their toys, books, play tools etc with friends. its very very normal bcos they fear that the friend will take it away and they love and are super possesive about their things it 'belongs to me' is their expression with frown eyebrows always afterall we pamper them with so many toys and mountains of play tools at home so all of a sudden a friend who is not a friend in the real sense wants to borrow they don't understand the concept. Try the trade trick if they show a hesitance to share - announce a trade idea ' lets trade the train for the Dino instead' how about that ? they get into thinking and slowly do understand this concept they might not share immediately but a few try s do work wonders but do not stress it too much just whenever they are ready!!
Side door messages work - Here s' a curious fact of human nature. we believe things we accidentally overhear than something that is told to us directly so if someone says i look beautiful i feel shes just being polite whereas if i hear her telling another friend about me (the same message) i would think its a honest opnion. Toddlers too tend to pay more attention to overhear us than pay attention to what we tell them directly. So here it is - Try to create a lot of gossiping and fairy tales pick up his toy phone and call up Daddy and appreciate what a good job he did building blocks or call his grand mom and say he is doing a great job eating his vegetables. All of that side door gossiping works!!!
Reverse psychology yes its superb - Making tendency to work in your favor is what s commonly called 'Reverse psychology' . I got this awesome book for potty training called 'its potty time'so a teddy bear refuses to use the seat although mommy says you are now a big boy. Mommy does not push. One day she brings another potty seat for teddy s doll and says the doll is big now and wears an underwear hence will not wet his pants and wants to use the potty seat so excuse me im going to put dolly in the seat give me a minute curious teddy walks behind and sees what mommy does to the doll teddy realises and says im a big boy too and i will use my potty seat from now on. I was shocked to know a parent started potty training her little one from the age of 9 months i really wonder if anyone can do that ever goshhh!! Every kid will do it when they are ready a toddler age typically post 2 is the best to introduce to a seat till then diapers are absolutely ok!!
Use reverse psychology at its best!!!
It aint time outs always there should be plenty of room for time ins too - Time - ins are little tidbits of attention and routine that help your toddler feel valued. Have you noticed when the phone rings your toddler rings his bells of screeches and screaming too thats bcos he knows you are going to ignore him for a bit they feel they have lost you in that period of time. After you finish the phone call (hopefully you've completed the phone conversation) try time - ins - hug them and tell them im here, few other time -ins that you can use more often during the day - give them a cozy massage and engage into a talk, share positive words and hopes, read a book at bedtime and cuddle them tight, make book sharing time a special time for closeness with your child, sing to your toddler, kiss them and say i love you. It works this is the age they wait to hear all this from you so go overboard!!!
.JPG) |
| one of my favorite Time - in |
Happy Toddlerhood and happy Parenthood !!!
Love,
Sunshine s Mamma
No comments:
Post a Comment